God’s Best: Choosing a Marriage Partner - Part 4


In these articles we would like to show to all who are unmarried that there is a better way than the world would teach to find a marriage partner. "God’s way" is the way of true blessing.


"Marriage is honourable in all and the bed undefiled" (Heb. 13:3).

As part of the blessing of marriage, God has given us the pleasure of showing love through physical union and the freedom of the display of mutual affection; all within the bounds of a secure relationship. In the marriage relationship there is complete freedom in this respect, but outside marriage this is forbidden as we can clearly see from our scripture. The world does not see this distinction, and the holiness and purity that God intended is destroyed. This relaxation of God's standard — where physical relationships are entered into wherever and with whomever one chooses — can only bring guilt and misery.

In all our relationships with the opposite sex we must make a clear and positive stand against this attitude; this will save us from being ensnared ourselves and will show a clear testimony to the world and an example to other believers.

The whole of Scripture is full of the errors of fornication (Acts 15:29) and adultery (Ex. 20:14). The first is sexual relationship outside of marriage, and the second sexual relationship with a married person. We must clearly state that physical affection is intended by God for one man and one woman within the confines of marriage — and to a very limited extent by a couple committed to marriage (see previous article).

With the current attitude of the world to these things we must ensure that our standards are not lowered so that the old nature within us is allowed to work and make us prey to the temptations we will face. Remember Joseph and Potiphar's wife (Gen. 39:13). "Flee youthful lusts" (2 Tim. 2:22).

Choosing to live together rather than marry is prevalent in the world around us. This is clearly fornication; there is no commitment to marry and no public declaration of marriage. The laws of most countries state that marriage must be lawfully enacted and Rom. 13:1 tells us, "the powers that be are ordained of God;" they must, therefore, be obeyed.

Let us take care to keep ourselves from the world's temptation by avoiding the display of the human body. This evil is all around us. Let's ensure that we give no room for the flesh by unsuitable dress and behaviour.

So as we grow from our youth let us keep our bodies (the temples of the Holy Spirit) pure and private until, in the will of God, He gives us a partner in marriage; in this holy relationship our physical desires can be satisfied.


God's will for marriage is that a couple may form a family unit to His glory, so that love may be displayed to those within, and reach out to those outside. A sphere where His honour may be maintained and obedience to Scripture practised and where children can be raised in the "nurture and admonition of the Lord" (Eph. 6:4). It is also for the blessing of man and wife. God gave Eve to Adam for an "helpmeet" to be his companion through life.

As with everything in the Scriptures, marriage is for the glory of the Lord Jesus. He is the originator of creation and all the laws and order in it. Marriage is part of that grand design. The beauty of the marriage relationship is testimony to His divine wisdom. Evolution theory, since it rejects the early chapters of the Bible, therefore rejects the account of Adam and Eve and the marriage bond established by God in the Garden of Eden. This is a great lie of our times.

Evolution takes from the Son of God the glory He has as creator, and so also, disregarding God’s laws in the Scripture relating to marriage, robs the Lord Jesus of His glory. The whole marriage relationship is a picture of Christ and the assembly. It is a picture of the unity between the Lord Jesus Christ and the Christian Church, which will be fully displayed when the marriage of the Lamb is seen in heaven. "He shall see of the travail of His soul and shall be satisfied" (Isa. 53:11).

If we ignore the holiness of the marriage relationship we bring dishonour to our Lord. There is no room for my selfish will.

A step out of the will of the Lord in disobedience will only result in sadness for oneself and others. However reasonable it may seem, if it contravenes the Biblical pattern it will bring disappointment.

My prayer is that as young people grow up, amidst all the temptation with which Satan will surround them in the world, they may, in patience and obedience, and as under God's clear direction, experience God's best in this area of their lives. Find a marriage partner (if this is their calling) to display love to each other as a type of Christ and His church, His Bride, and know God's best together until our Lord comes.

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